• Faith,  Life

    True Life: I Hate The Unknown

    August 24, 2015

    It’s true. I hate the unknown more than anything. When I don’t know the details of things that are happening in my life I get anxious. I love to be prepared and when I’m prepared I think that I’m the one in control of what is happening in my life. Obviously this isn’t true in the slightest. God’s in control, no matter how much planning and preparing I do. He ultimately decides how things happen in my life.

    Planning and preparing aren’t bad things in themselves of course, I think God honors us when we are responsible and plan for things that are happening in our lives. But I believe it’s a sin when we plan and plan and plan so much that we think we are out planning God. I don’t know if anyone else struggles with this but sometimes I think I know better than God does. I know what I’ll enjoy and I want to enjoy it when I want it. I can be very impatient at times.

    The most frustrating part to me is that I KNOW Jesus’s ways are better than my own. I know that waiting on His timing will only bring me more joy, but sometimes I still feel that I know better or maybe it’s just that I can be selfish at times and I want what I want more than I want to wait for whatever Jesus has prepared for me.

    I’m having a hard time with this but I know that Jesus will carry me through. What do you guys do when you struggle with waiting on Jesus? I’d love to hear from you.

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  • Marriage

    Bliss Part 2

    August 21, 2015

    Hi friends 🙂 I just wanted to stop by and elaborate on my last post (if you missed it, you can check it out here). When I wrote that one I was having one of those days where I was so exhausted that I was having a hard time really focusing on getting out what I really wanted to say. I thought I’d try my best to try to explain a little more about my thoughts behind the post today but I’ve also been having I guess what you would call writer’s block. I can’t clearly get across what I want to write about lately and I haven’t really had any great ideas to write about either which has been kind of discouraging. Sometimes I even think that starting this blog wasn’t a good idea and that maybe I’m not all that great at writing anyway but I am going to persevere and see how things go.

    So back to the point of this post (hopefully this one will be a little clearer) – my heart behind the last post was that waiting on God specifically when it comes to a dating relationship is way more worth it than you could ever imagine it to be. Thinking back on the years I went through wishing and wanting and praying for a boyfriend are some what of a blur now. Looking back isn’t exactly a fun experience either because it reminds me of how much more I wanted a boyfriend or husband than I really wanted the Lord but it makes me really appreciate to be in where I am today.

    I took my relationships into my own hands for quite a while and had to go through quite a few heartbreaks before I was willing to admit that maybe God knows a better way. I am just so thankful that the Lord never gave up on me though and kept pursuing me despite my sin and eventually got through to my stubborn heart.

    I wanted to encourage those of you out there who might be in a similar season. Maybe you have taken things into your own hands and suffered the consequences, or maybe you haven’t yet but are really struggling not to. Being on the other end of the spectrum now, in a  relationship that is God-honoring and such a joy, I can honestly say that every moment of the confusion and pain of waiting will be more than worth it in the end.

    Running ahead of God and pursuing a relationship that is not honoring to Him may be fun for a season but usually ends in heartbreak. And even if it doesn’t, I can promise that a relationship outside of His design will never have the same joys that one with Him in the center of it does.

    And I want you to know that I only know this through experience. I’ve been in relationships that were not God-honoring and they do not compare to the one I’m in today. I went through the waiting process (sometimes gracefully, most times not) and on the other end I can tell you the only reason why it is worth it is because in that waiting process you learn that GOD IS ENOUGH. You learn that He’s all you need and how to make Him to be the desire of your heart rather than a husband (or wife). This then sets you up in a wonderful place to eventually be able honor and respect your future husband in the correct way rather than elevate him to be a god in your heart. It sets you up to have such a sweet relationship where you both can love and spur each other on to fall more and more in love with Jesus.

    I am so so thankful for my relationship with Tommy and how God uses him to continually point me towards Himself. I couldn’t ask for a more thoughtful and loving guy. He is always pursuing me and putting my desires before his own and I really don’t understand how I got so lucky. It’s never easy to wait on God, no matter what the circumstances are, but it is always worth it.

    Some things that really helped me in the waiting process was to read my Bible and cry out to Jesus when I was at my lowest. Tell Him how you feel, He is cares and is closer than you realize.

    The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. – Psalm 24:18

    Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you. – 1 Peter 5:7

    Something that also helped was reading books written by people who had been in my shoes and had good advice for me. Some of those books that really helped were:

    Praying For Your Future Husband: Preparing Your Heart For His – By Robin Jones Gunn

    Lady In Waiting: Becoming God’s Best While Waiting For Mr. Right – By Jackie Kendall

    Another thing that helped was talking to others about how I was feeling. I know we may be strangers but I have been there and if anyone needs just someone to listen and be encouraged I want you to know that I am here just for that. My hopes in writing posts like these are to help others and I would love to do that on more of a personal level as well.

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  • Faith

    A Secret About Your Fears

    August 15, 2015

    I felt like God wanted me to write about this specific topic earlier today but I reasoned with myself and told myself that I didn’t really feel in the mood to write at the time so I decided not to write about it.

    What I wanted to write though was that God has really been trying to show me the secret of why I fear things is because I picture the fear without God being there. 

    God’s really been telling me over and over again lately that He is always with me. And that this is the most important thing that I can remember, especially in those times that I’m worrying about something in my future. If I think back to my past, about the hard things I’ve gone through (and there have been a lot if I’m honest), and I realized that He was always there through all that, and that He is still here for me now, then I need to start picturing Him in the future as well.

    I just read my devotional, Jesus Calling for the day and I want to share it with you:

    Sit quietly with me, letting all your fears and worries bubble up to the surface of your consciousness. There, in the light of My Presence, the bubbles pop and disappear. However, some fears surface over and over again, especially fear of the future. You tend to project yourself mentally into the next day, week, month, year, decade; and you visualize yourself coping badly in those times. What you are seeing is a false image, because it doesn’t include Me. Those gloomy times that you imagine will not come to pass, since My Presence will be with you at all times. When a future-oriented worry assails you, capture it and disarm it by suffusing the Light of My Presence into that mental image. Say to yourself, “Jesus will be with me then and there. With His help, I can cope!” Then, come to the present moment, where you can enjoy Peace in my Presence”

    Once I read this I knew I had to write about it. This is the secret to conquering our fears. There’s no reason to worry about the future because He will be with us and He will give us the strength to get through whatever may cross our paths. What an awesome God we have.

    “Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.” –Deuteronomy 31:6

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  • Faith,  Life

    how to experience J O Y in every day life

    August 6, 2015

    Okay so my computer has a virus and that’s why I haven’t been blogging all that much. I’m currently on my work computer (shh don’t tell anyone). But my plan is to buy a Mac, hopefully tonight actually.

    I love sharing what God’s doing in my life in hopes to encourage others too. God’s really teaching me how to experience joy amidst my every day life.

    Joy.

    Real joy. Something that I’m not too familiar with if I’m being honest. God’s really teaching me how to really enjoy my life. Wanna know the secret? Focus on the good. Only the good. Acknowledge the bad, sure. But focus on the good. Dwell on it. Be thankful for it. All of the good, even the small stuff. Especially the small stuff.

    A fresh cup of coffee

    Sunshine at lunch

    Good smelling lotion

    A cute coffee mug

    A sweet kiss

    There’s so many good things to be thankful for on any given day, it just takes us to direct our attention towards them to realize they’re there. I also found this is the key to struggling with contentment as well. It’s hard to be wishing for more when we realize just how much good we already have. We are blessed, truly blessed and I don’t ever want to forget it. Join with me and let’s commit to never getting bored of the blessings in our lives.

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  • Faith,  Marriage

    Life Update: God Cares About The Small Things Too!

    July 29, 2015

    Disclaimer: This is super long and way more personal than my prior posts. I hope you guys will enjoy learning more about my life and what God is doing in it. I’d love to hear about yours as well! Leave a comment with your blog website and I’d love to check it out 🙂

    God is SO good guys! My main reason for documenting this is because I really want to be able to clearly remember how God showed up and answered my prayers in such an amazing way. My hopes is that it encourages you too and helps you to remember that God is always here with us and cares so so much about us.

    So let me let you to what’s currently going on in my life a little bit. As I’ve written about in an older post, I have been dating Tommy for quite some time now – tomorrow is actually our 9 month anniversary! Tommy and I by no means have a perfect relationship, we have our struggles just as everybody else does but I know that this is the man that God has made for me to marry. He is the most thoughtful and caring guy I have ever known. He loves Jesus, most importantly, which is what makes our relationship so great.

    Tommy and I have gotten to the point where we know that we want to marry each other but we are trying to figure out the details and getting ready for that point. Obviously this means that we would both need to be financially able to live on our own. I am most likely going to have to find a new job within the next six months or so because my bank has been pending a merger for about 3 years now (lol) so if/when that goes through I will be let go. I just graduated from college in May though and am not too worried about finding something, just because I know that God will provide and take care of me.

    Tommy happens to be two years younger than I am and he has not exactly figured out which direction he wants to go in when it comes to jobs. His dad is a welder and for a while his plan was to learn from his dad and become a welder also. This path however is a little uncertain because his dad would have to be able to get him a job at the quarry that he works at and we weren’t sure that this was 100% going to be able to happen. Tommy also has an interest in business and has been debating continuing his education and getting a business degree. (Did you catch that?? He’s hands on (wanting to be a welder) and also super smart when it comes to managing money… am I a lucky girl or what?!)

    But this has been tough for me because I can be quite an impatient person sometimes and always one to want to be in control of things. Both Tommy and I have felt that our relationship is at the point where we want to take the next step (& get engaged!!) but we obviously need to make a mature decision and make sure that we can provide for ourselves once we’re married. So to the impatient part lol I have realized that if Tommy chooses to continue with his education that we will most likely have to wait until he graduates before we are able to get married, which could be about 2-3 years. I’m not going to lie I went through a time where I was really struggling with this. I admit that I don’t want to wait that long, and I had a time where I was really unhappy thinking about him doing this. But I also really wanted to be able to support him no matter what he chose to do and I wanted him to make the right decision for himself. I spent a lot of time praying and telling God how I was feeling about it and I can honestly say that He gave me the grace to trust that His plan was way better than mine and be 100% okay with whatever Tommy chose to do, even if that meant that we had to wait 2 or 3 years to get married.

    Now to the exciting part… God seems to really have answered Tommy and I’s prayers in a crazy way. Right when we felt that working with his dad was not really an option anymore, God brought this option back and I can’t tell you how grateful I am. Tommy’s dad is planning to try to get him learning more about welding throughout the rest of this year and hopefully get him in at the quarry sometime early next year! When Tommy told me about this I couldn’t believe it, I’ve never had God surprise me in such a way and it really shows me how much he actually cares about the details of our lives. If Tommy gets the job with his dad, we will be able to get married, and he will also probably have enough time to go back to school to learn business as well. It’s a win all around and so amazing.

    Although I do recognize that God could change his plans again, and it is possible for Tommy to not get the job with his dad, I still am insanely grateful for the hope that He has given us that this is the path that He is leading us down. I’m so excited to see what He has in store for us, even if things do change and Tommy and I aren’t able to get married for 2-3 years. I just am so grateful to have such an amazing man in my life and a God who loves us so much that He takes the time to care about the small details and leads us down the correct path.

    If you managed to read all of this and make it this far, you’re the best!! This was super long haha but something I felt I really wanted to share. Would you mind just praying for Tommy and I – that we would keep following down God’s path for us? Thanks so much guys!

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  • Faith

    To The Perfectionists

    July 28, 2015

    It’s okay.

    It’s okay not to have it all together.

    Sometimes I know this but for me to actually believe it, it’s impossible. There’s a verse in the bible about being perfect isn’t there? Oh yeah…

    “Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.” – Matthew 5:48

    But what does “perfect” look like in the eyes of God? What is He expecting of us? This is something that I have struggled with trying to understand for quite some time now. But God has finally freed me from the slavery of trying to be perfect. All I had to do was ask…

    I prayed about how much I struggled with trying to be perfect and how I felt that I needed to be for Him to love me. I got that Jesus died for me because I wasn’t but I also knew that it wasn’t okay for me to keep sinning either. So I wondered, what did God expect of me?

    And he answered my prayer, He has led my heart down an amazing path of healing from perfectionism. He knows I’m not perfect, and He knows you’re not perfect.

    Yet He loves us anyway.

    What God cares most about is your heart. He desires to know the real you. The messy you. The you that you don’t even like. He desires for us to let Him in and ask Him to help us to be better. Only He can do that anyway, we can strive and strive all we want to be better, look better, feel better. But without letting Him in and asking Him to change us, we can’t and we won’t be better.

    “But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.'” – 2 Corinthians 12:9

    This was the verse I was missing. The perfection I was looking for and God expected me to strive after was already completed in Jesus’s work on the cross. Now that’s all that’s left to do now is:

    REST.

    In his grace. Because it is sufficient.

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