• Baby,  Life

    My Biggest Struggle With Being a SAHM: A Part of Me Is Missing

    November 18, 2019

    I think it’s time I finally write this post. I have been struggling with being a stay-at-home mom since Shane was probably around six months old.

    So a little backstory for you if you’re new here: I got married in May 2016, quit my full-time job in December 2016, got pregnant in April 2017, and had my son in January 2018.

    A Dream Come True

    I quit my job in 2016 to pursue trying to make money from home. It’s something I’ve always wanted to do. Things have not gone quite how I thought they would though. I got pregnant only four months after I quit my job and that turned everything on it’s head.

    I kind of decided to put making money at home on the back-burner either temporarily or possibly even permanently because I was going to be a mom! That’s all I really cared about and felt that once my son was born I would feel fulfilled and wouldn’t care about working from home anymore.

    Moral of this blog post: that didn’t happen.

    Part Of Me Is Missing

    I love my son to death and am so incredibly thankful that I get to stay home with him but it just feels like part of me is missing.

    So another little backstory for those of you who don’t know: I grew up in a home where I had to fight hard for the things I wanted. My family didn’t have much and I realized at a young age that if I wanted my life to be different then I had to put in the work to change things.

    I went to college and worked full-time during the last two years before I graduated. I got lucky and my uncle’s work hired me as a part-time worker, which later turned into a full-time job, which later turned into me being the supervisor.

    I graduated, became supervisor, and really learned that hard work pays off. It became a big part of me. I learned a lot about myself through that process and I was proud of who I became and where I had gotten myself.

    That’s why I was so confident in trying to make money from home. I learned that I could do what I set my mind to.

    Shifting Gears

    But all of that changed when I found out I was pregnant. I was ready to fully embrace this new role and expected it to fulfill me the way that working hard at a full-time job did. But honestly, it hasn’t and I hate that. I want to be fulfilled with being home with my babies. I love my son and want to stay home and be the one to love on him throughout the day.

    I just feel like part of me is missing though. I love having a schedule and being able to see the results of my hard work. Being a mom is wonderful in a lot of ways but there definitely isn’t the same rewards for doing a good job.

    I know it may seem like the solution to this might be going back to work but I honestly think I would be more unhappy leaving my son and going to work than I am staying home with him.

    I don’t have a happy ending or a bow to tie on the end of this story. I guess I just wanted to let you know that if you feel the same way, you aren’t alone. I see a lot of voices out there sharing how they absolutely love being a stay at home mom or others who are struggling with being a working mom, but I haven’t come across many who are struggling with staying home. It sometimes makes me feel guilty because I know how fortunate I am to be able to do this. I don’t take it lightly. But that doesn’t make it easy for me either.

    Going Forward

    That doesn’t mean that I’m just going to just leave things as they are. I’m still going to be trying to find a work/home life balance. My husband and I did start an Etsy shop last year, so that has helped a bit, and I am thinking of starting a Youtube channel as well/maybe just working hard to blog more consistently. But whatever the case, I am and will forever be grateful to stay home and raise my babies – no matter how crazy it may make me. 🤣

    If you’re a mom, please leave a comment and share your story about when you became a mom and if you are fulfilled with either being a SAHM or working mom.

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  • Home,  Life

    We Bought A House! + Life Update

    November 1, 2019

    You guys, is anyone still here? I have barely blogged at all this year and I honestly am having such a hard time even starting this post because it feels so awkward!

    So lets just jump right in then shall we? We bought a house! Actually we bought a house over a month ago 🤦🏻‍♀️. It was a crazy stressful process, as I’m sure you already know if you’ve ever bought a house. There were a few things that happened where we thought we would have to back out of the house. Like the seller wouldn’t do anything at all to fix the house (which there was a lot to do) and then the well water failed for bacteria 😱! It was quite the adventure.

    But we overcame all of those obstacles and are officially homeowners! Like I mentioned earlier, there’s a lot to do here. Mostly minor renovations though. But add in an almost two year old and it gets quite overwhelming as you might imagine.

    But we are slowly working on the things we want to get done (we’re putting up a fence this weekend!) and maybe if I can get my act together enough, maybe I can even blog about some of the projects we are doing. No promises though. 😉

    Oh and another big thing… I got my wisdom teeth out! One week after closing on our home! Womp womp. That was not fun at all, and it’s actually been something I have been straight terrified to do for like my entire life. But I did it! And it really wasn’t as bad as I had thought it would be. Not a fun experience, but not the worst thing in the world either.

    Also, Shane is going to be two in January! Totally not okay. I don’t understand how time goes so quickly. He’s learning and growing so much and it’s both awesome and so very sad. We watched all of his baby videos the other day and it just made me so emotional. I wish he could stay little forever.

    So those are basically the big things that I haven’t written about in months but things are finally starting to settle down here so maybe I can keep this space a little more updated over the next few months. We shall see!

    Thanks for reading! I’d really love to know, how have you been lately??

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  • Life

    Blog Update: Where To Go From Here?

    August 27, 2019

    It’s been over three months since I’ve shown up in this space. That may be the longest break I’ve ever taken. I didn’t exactly intend to take such a long break but it’s been much needed. 

    I needed a break to re-evaluate this space and to be able to see it clearly. 

    For a long time I’ve felt very lost in this space. I originally started this blog to create community and to make money even.

    What I’ve realized within the past year or so is that the pressure to make money blogging totally sucked any fun out of writing or documenting my life. I haven’t been motivated to write because I haven’t had a clear direction with this space.

    I keep toggling back and forth between this being just a place to document my life and between writing posts to make money. I haven’t been enjoying the process either as you can imagine. Not having a clear direction or purpose for this blog just feels confusing when I finally do sit down to write a post.

    Recently, I’ve been in this season where I’ve been realizing that I get to curate my life the way that I want it to be (more on this soon). I don’t have to participate in an activity, such as blogging, if I don’t want to. I know that sounds kind of strange but let me try to explain.

    Sometimes I see someone else that I look up to either in real life or online, enjoying or being successful at something and think that I would enjoy or can be successful at it too. I’m sure that’s not a rare occurrence but where it becomes a problem for me is that I forget to check back in with myself to see if I am actually enjoying whatever it is that I started.

    I’ve been in a place of re-evaluating different areas of my life and whether or not I want to spend time or energy on them. When it came to blogging I realized that I wasn’t actually enjoying this little blog, which is why I’ve never been able to be consistent with it.

    The pressure to be like other successful bloggers and to make money sucked all of the fun out of blogging. It also sucked all of the creative energy out of the process. Blogging was a chore instead of a hobby.

    My new plan is to turn this space strictly into a hobby. Erase the pressure and do it for fun. I plan to write when I want to and about things that I’m interested in writing about.

    I want to be more intentional in this space. I used to write posts on a whim and barely edit them. I want my posts to be more meaningful. I want to share my experience as a mother, a wife, a follower of Jesus and connect with others. I want to be proud of what I’m writing.

    Let’s see how these changes affect my little space on the internet. I have a feeling it’s going to be a very, very good thing.

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  • Etsy,  Life

    Friday Favorites | Vol. 10

    May 17, 2019

    Happy Friday, friends! I have some fun things to share today so let’s jump right in. 🙂

    o n e

    These cups

    Not the best picture but these cups are soo cute! I bought them at Target a few weeks ago and have been loving using them all day.

    It adds just a little bit of summer to my day, which makes me happy. They are also deceivingly bigger than they look. They hold 20oz of water!

    t w o

    Speaking of summer, we booked our first beach vacation for next month in Ocean City, NJ! We are so excited to take Shane to the beach for a few days.

    Tommy and I both love the beach and try to take a longer trip every year but we weren’t able to last year. We did go down for a day with Shane last year though. He loved it so hopefully he will this year as well!

    If anyone has any tips on what to bring with us that will be helpful for being at the beach with a toddler, please let me know!

    t h r e e

    Found here

    I found this cleaning schedule at the beginning of the week and have been loving it! I have been feeling overwhelmed about getting everything done and this really simplifies it and makes it seem doable. I’m all for anything that will make my life simpler. 😉

    f o u r

    Another favorite this week would be walks with my boy! As a SAHM sometimes I really just need to get out of the house and Shane really loves it as well so its a win-win for the both of us!

    f i v e

    Etsy shop here

    I’m still loving working on the orders for our Etsy shop with my husband. There has been a learning curve for sure and hasn’t been all rainbows and sunshine but I feel like we are really starting to get into a groove and have fun working together. Yay!

    That’s all for this week. Linking up with Narci.

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  • Life,  Self Care

    What I Learned From My Social Media Detox

    March 21, 2019

    A little over a month ago I decided it was time I took a social media break. I decided that I would do 30 days and asked my husband to do it along with me. I learned a lot from those 30 days so I thought I’d share that with you here today!

    Why I Decided To Do a Social Media Detox

    The answer to this was pretty simple really. I decided I needed some time away from social media because I felt like it was consuming my life a bit. I felt super addicting to checking my phone and it was really starting to bother me. I also really wanted to see what else I would be doing if I wasn’t scrolling endlessly on my phone.

    So I proposed to my husband that we do a 30 day social media detox and he eagerly agreed. What I’ve also noticed since then is a lot of people that I follow online are talking about either needing to do the same or should do the same. It seems we all are feeling a bit overly attached to our phones.

    What I Learned From My Detox: The Comparison Trap

    The most important thing I learned over those 30 days was that the comparison trap of social media affected me waaaaay more than I had ever realized.

    For me, this mostly had to do with working on my Etsy shop. I’ve always wanted to work from home. So naturally I’ve found a lot of women online that do work from home and have started following their lives hoping to learn something from them to make that possible for me.

    What I honestly didn’t realize was that watching their lives so often was completely paralyzing me from really working hard at what I wanted.

    I realized that because I’m just starting out on my business venture that watching people who already have what I want makes me feel really badly about myself. Crazy right? I already knew that this is a long time complaint of social media. That people feel badly about their own lives after being on social media. But to be completely honest, I didn’t know I was one of them until I did this social media detox.

    Because for me, I realized that they aren’t conscious thoughts that are causing me to think these things. Like I never had the thought, “I’ll never have that.” or “I feel really badly for not having that yet.” after being on social media.

    What I realized was that they were just feelings I would get as I was scrolling. I never would fully dwell on them long enough to even realize it was happening but after taking the 30 day break I could see it so much clearer.

    Because in those 30 days I got so much done. I worked hard on my Etsy shop and actually did the things that I had planned to do for it for so long. I didn’t feel badly about where I was and I didn’t second guess myself. I just worked hard and felt good about it.

    Jumping Back In

    So what have I done now that I’ve learned this? That’s the hard part for me because I feel like staying off social media would be really good for me honestly. But the thing is I don’t want to stay off social media for good.

    I enjoy following along with my “online friends” but I definitely realized something had to change.

    One major thing I did was to unfollow (or mute) so many people I was following. I went through everyone and basically asked myself why I was following that person. If I didn’t have a good reason then I unfollowed. I unfollowed or muted a lot of people that I knew as acquaintances because our time is valuable. I realized that if I was going to spend time on Instagram then I didn’t want it to be time wasted. If someone encouraged me or if they were a real friend who I genuinely cared about what was going on in their life, then I kept following.

    This has helped a bit and I am definitely more conscious of the comparison trap when it’s happening now. I also have decided to take more social media breaks more often. Once a week, my husband and I stay off social media completely on Saturdays and I feel like this helps a lot too.

    So have you ever taken a social media break? What have you learned? I’d love to hear your experience with this!

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  • Life

    Friday Favorites | Vol. 9

    March 8, 2019

    I haven’t done a Friday Favorites since August 18, 2017!!! But I want to start doing them more consistently. I think it’ll be a fun way to incorporate a little bit of our day-to-day into the blog every week!

    o n e

    FEELING LIKE A HUMAN AGAIN! I intended to start this post last Friday but we all came down with the stomach bug last week!! It was horrible! But I’m so thankful for all of us to be feeling better again and to get back into our regular routine. You really don’t realize how thankful you are for the mundane life until you get sick or something not so great happens!

    t w o

    Packing away baby things! While part of me is sad that Shane is getting further and further from the baby stage, part of me is excited to move on. I had a pretty hard first year as a mom (as I’ve mentioned before), and it’s been really fun to get my footing a little more and move past the hard times.

    Anyways, I’m looking for a better way to store these bottles. Does anyone have any ideas? I’m thinking of buying a plastic storage container with a lid. I feel like maybe that’s the best way to do it.

    t h r e e

    cover

    Outings with my boy! 🙂 We are in the transition from switching from two to one nap so I’ve been trying to get out of the house more otherwise I run out of things to do with him by 10 am. 😅

    It’s been so much fun getting out and just running errands with Shane. It’s great for him too. He’s in this adorable phase where he’s pointing at everything and saying “dat” so we will tell him what it is. You should have heard him in Target!

    f o u r

    Get Chicken Quesadillas Recipe from Food Network
    picture via

    I am probably so late to the game on this but we’ve just recently been really enjoying quesadillas. I feel like this is probably a staple in many people’s houses and it’s definitely become one in ours! We’ve used this recipe and they come out great every time! What are some staples in your houses? I’m always looking for some easy but delicious meals to make!

    f i v e

    We have been loving Little Blue Truck lately. Shane just loves to read and particularly loves this one. We started out with Little Blue Truck’s Halloween and I meant to pick up the Christmas one but never did. Then I saw the classic one in the store a few weeks ago and just had to get it for him. And now it’s all he wants to read! 😂

    I’m always looking for new books for him too because we are slowly building his collection. What books are your kids favorites?

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